I came across the above photo today and it reminded me of what I needed to do in order to get through the brokenness and grief that I currently feel.

Freely experience emotion with love.

Many times when we go through difficult periods in our lives we simply want to do just that, get through them. I mean who doesn’t want it to quickly be over right? I know right now all I want to do is fast forward to a time when I feel ok again, but I’m learning that the key to healing our hurts is to allow ourselves to feel our emotions, go through the pain, the sadness, the anger or whatever it is we feel, and to do it with love. Doing it with love is the most important aspect because in reality we have to show ourselves love during hard times most of all. We need that extra patience and extra care and extra kindness. It helps reassure us that we’re human and we’re struggling and it’s ok. That we will get through it but we must allow ourselves to feel our way through.

I’m going to be honest, I like feelings. I love the happy ones at least, but when it comes to hard feelings, I try to avoid them as best as I can. I deny them. I hide from them. I simply pretend they do not exist because I don’t want to feel them. They hurt. Why would you want to purposely allow yourself to feel something that makes you feel so incredibly sad?

But you have to do it. It’s like knowing that you have to pull off that bandaid eventually otherwise the wound will never heal properly. So we must do the same with our emotional wounds. We must feel these uncomfortable and mostly painful feelings in order to find true and eventual healing.

It’s scary I know. I keep telling myself over and over again that it’s ok to feel sad and hurt. And it’s ok to cry. And it’s ok to want to scream. And it’s ok to be angry. And sometimes you have to do that with yourself. You have to consistently remind yourself that it is ok! That you will not feel this way forever.

You will also notice that once you begin to allow yourself to feel, with times those painful emotions will lessen their hold on you, and instead they will be replaced with newfound hope. It will come, if you allow it.

So as a reminder to myself and to all of you who are working through any kind of sadness, pain, heartbreak, or hurt. Allow yourself to feel it. Keep moving through the feelings. And give yourself love through the entire process.

I love you all. Here’s to happier times.

The Self Love Daily Challenge #035: allow yourself to freely feel your feelings and do it with love and kindness.


Christina Ciro